Helping You Succeed

Rhordan Wicks

INTRODUCTION

We are all relational beings. Despite being in a world that is more interconnected, we have become more disconnected than before. We long for honest, loving, genuine and accepting relationships. How are we to succeed in our relationships? This week, we look at Words. Words are powerful and determine the direction of our lives, the relationships we experience and the reality we live in. Words are permanent and should be carefully considered before they are spoken because they cannot be taken back. Words can either hurt or heal, as they reflect our identity and shape our destiny. Whatever we choose to say has an impact on others as well as on us.

So, we are called to look out for the Truth, Timing, Tone, and Trajectory of our Words. And to let the Holy Spirit touch us as we speak. May we repent of the words we use and change the words we use.

DISCUSSION

  1. What are the relationships that are important in your life? Why are they important and has God been a part of these relationships?

  2. Truth
    a. Read the following passages:
    • Proverbs 6:16-19
    • Proverbs 12:17, 19-20, 22
    • Proverbs 24:26, 28-29

    What do these verses say about the importance of Truth in our words? What sort of Truth is in focus here?

    b. When might we be tempted not to speak the Truth in our life today? How might we be able to meet these challenges?

  3. Timing
    a. Read the following passages:
    • Proverbs 15:23
    • Proverbs 18:13
    • Proverbs 25:11, 13

    Then read:
    • Ecclesiastes 3:7
    • Esther 4:12-16

    Why does the timing of what we say matter? How do we tell when the right time is to share something sensitive?

  4. Tone
    a. Read the following passages:
    • Proverbs 12:18
    • Proverbs 15:1, 4
    • Proverbs 16:21-24
    • Proverbs 25:15

    Then read:
    • Ephesians 4:14-16
    • Galatians 2:11-14
    • Micah 2:6-11

    What should determine the tone of our words? Does a right tone necessarily mean a nice tone?

    b. Do you use different tones for different groups of people e.g. family vs. friends? Should there be a difference?

  5. Trajectory
    a.
    Read the following passages:
    • Proverbs 10:32
    • Proverbs 11:9-12
    • Proverbs 28:23

    Then read:
    • 1 Thessalonians 5:9-11
    • Revelation 2:1-7 (notice the apostle’s pattern of encouraging the church, while attaching a ‘but’ to his encouragement)

    What should the trajectory of our words be? Are we only to praise? If not, is it possible to rebuke without hurting others?

    b. How have words brought healing into your life or those of your loved ones? Share with your group.

  6. Many of us want a better relationship with our loved ones and those around us. How has what we learnt today helped us?

    Change is never easy and is something all of us fear, in one way or another. We can only change if we repent from the words we use, with the help of the Holy Spirit. Only the Holy Spirit can change our hearts and change our words. As a group, might we be moved to repent today?

WHAT WOULD YOU DO

We must repent from the words we use and seek the Holy Spirit to change our hearts so that we can change the words and the manner of our speech. We should speak words that bring life. So, begin to speak differently.

Ask God to fill your speech with words that lift others and with the gentleness that breaks any barrier.

MEMORY VERSE

To humans belong the plans of the heart, but from the Lord comes the proper answer of the tongue. ~Proverbs 16:1